The New Year is upon us!

I have the desire to say something meaningful and important. This is what "should" be done in the new year. Nope, don't have that sentimental thing happening today.....

I'm looking forward to getting started. I have some good ideas and I'm looking forward to finding out how to move forward with them. I have five more months of funding left, I really really hope that I can pull this off!

HAPPY NEW YEAR EVERYONE!

Big Cities and interest?

Business is tough in the big city. It seems like no one cares. I just had this huge event the other day. 60 people came out. I advertised so hard. I sent out emails, posted flyers, talked to people, gave my vendors personalized flyers, etc. etc. It's so frustrating. Some exhibitors were really disapointed. They felt like it was a waste of their time. Others get it and see the value in it. They see that it is important to network and that sales may not come immediately. I never claimed to be a huge trade show or something where they will make hundreds of dollars. Gosh, I am sure most of them made more money than I did, and I worked my butt off!

What's the point. No one cares about stuff in the big city. There so much to care about, that we choose to care about nothing.

The Murder of Passion

When did it call become about money?

My partner and I were talking about how much the music industry has changed and how it seems that the popular music of today is very stylized to fit a very specific demographic. It seems that even the underground musicians are trying to fit themselves into this little box as well.

I'm not saying these people are bad for trying to do this? Gosh, I think this is what I'm doing too - trying to fit my business into this neat little box that the consumer will want (aka understand)without question. The problem, for me, is that my business doesn't fit into a box. It's different and hard to understand by nature. The only way to put it into a box is by changing it entirely.

Will I? Will I pick money over passion? Do I have to? Do I even have passion anymore? Is my passion money now? Am I one of "those" people? Do I have to be one of "those" people? Am I insinuating money is bad? I don't want to think money is bad. I just don't want to put money ahead of passion and happines. I don't want to fall in love with money....how pathetic would that be!

Is money murdering passion? Or, metaphorically....is money our gun.... meaning, are we murdering passion?

Is Oprah passionate about her work, or is she passionate about her work because it has made her freeking loaded? Would she be just as passionate if she were still poor? Is there purpose to staying true to passion if staying true to it keeps you struggling? If you are truly passionate, is that when money finally finds its way to you?

How does it work? What's the formula? Is there a formula?

I think for me it's important to accept that without money it's hard to be passionate because a lot of what makes us passionate is sharing our ideas with people who care. If no one cares, why bother?

What if people only care if it's free? What if the value on what you have to offer is so menial you just can't afford to do it? What happens to passion then?

Is passion and business different? Do we have to separate them entirely? Perhaps trying to make them work together will drive me utterly mad!

The Meaning of Success

As I'm sure we all know, success means a number of things. Here are some questions to help us determine what success means to us...or if we have it yet....?

1. Can we have success without sacrificing something that is important to us?
2. Is there such thing as having it all?
3. How big of a role does money play in succes?
4. Can we be a millionaire and still have a rewarding life outside of making money?
5. Will people like you for you, once you are wealthy?
6. Can you be successful in one part of your life while being wildly UNsuccessful in another part?
Think about it.

Money Issues & Success

Ya know how some people pretend when they have money when they don't......or the whole notion that the wealthy are cheap is interesting to me right now for a number of reasons.

My parents always critisized people who didn't spend money to make their home really nice or to make themselves look really nice. My dad always said if you aren't look rich, you should look or pretend to be rich. I kind of get that because we are what we think..... but, there is also the idea that sometimes you just have to be cheap and realize that you can't have certain things and there is no shame in admitting it to yourself or others.

Or, is there? Do you receive less respect in business when you are struggling? Will people wonder why to work with you if you aren't successful?

What does all of this mean. Argh. Meditating on these ideas.... success? money? How do they relate?

Procrastination

Ya know, until I was actually working full-time on my business I was so much more motivated and hard-working. It seems that this has started to make me lazy..... Why is that? Why do I get so unsatsified so quickly?

Perhaps one day this will be answered.... for now, I'm going to blame it on the crappy Ontario November weather. YUCK!

The better side of business

I've been reading over some of my emails and realize that I probably sound like the hugest whiner on the planet. Complain complain complain that's all I do.

Well, here's a better side of me... the better side of being in biz.

I've been spending a lot of time walking to all of the businesses in the area giving them discount coupons for my workshops and some really good things have come of it. Not only have I met some really nice people, but, I got an exhibitor for one event and I've even had a few potential calls regarding my workshops. It's really good!

ALSO. I put event listings in the local paper and someone just called me regarding the listing. Isn't that coolest thing ever!

See, lot's of good things happen. I should really stop using this as a forum for bitching and complaining!

Reality of it

Wow. It's amazing how I've been sick so much since October. I was better for about 5-10 days and now I feel something coming on again. It can't be the stress, I'm hardly worrying about business. I suppose if I'm worried, it's only because I should be more worried...... :)

It's amazing how much of an effect this has on success because getting ill really affects motivation and excitment about things. Especially when all you want to do is sleep.

New challenges keep coming up. Recently someone told me that starting a business is the hardest thing one could try to do. It is so true. There are so many challenges involved. Not only do you actually have to make money, but in my case there are all of these emotional issues to deal with in terms of confidence and drive. I think I said before that being an entrepreneur has a huge effect on personal growth. It has to be... if I don't grow, I can't be successful.